Tuesday, 30 June 2009

Time to come clean

Hi to you all,
I have been avoiding posting as I have had my sister on the phone having a go about my well lets be frank (well I much rather be Fran giggle) slutty behaviour!

She can not understand why I can not be "Normal"!!!!

I made the mistake of trying to explain instead of telling her I am normal. I tried the well I am now a women and I want to experience it all you have had years to get your head around it all. This did not work she then tried to explain and I must admit to crying at this point as it ewas rather hurtful. She went on to say that I was a man pretending to be a girl and therefore behaved like a man or more like she added a gay man fucking all over the place.

I calmed down and asked her how many partners she had when she was at college or around the same age as me. She replied what the hell has that got to do with it.

I said look do you want to read about what is happening to me via the blog or as I promised to share things with you first. 

She started to cry and we both did then. We made up and then I went to bed - That was last night. 

Well she just called and has told me not to blog anymore and to stop being Tabitha - I replied how can I stop being me she screamed you are not a girl and put the phone down. 

I am shaking with fear and anger and I have decided to carry on the blog and to never again be untrue to myself. 

My makeup is running and I am typing this watching my hands as if I am removed from them my finger nails which are french tipped seem to belong to someone else. 

The keyboard feels remote and I am so tired. I find these huge swings of mood exhausting I am on hormones and I was warned but I wonder if my sister was right....

Am I a man with mens ideas feelings and behaviour wrapped up in pretty la perla under wear?
Or am I as I have come to believe a slutty girl. I really do not care I really don't blushing and beginning to cry I don't CARE

I want to look like this so thin so pretty so pert so sexy. I want men to desire me and women to hate me as I walk past. I want to be an object of lust.

I want a mistress to use me and abuse me I so want to feel her hand on my body

I want to fill a bra and make my nipples hard I want to be sexy.

I want to be fucked hard and then pass out with cum drying on me

I want to be a mans toy collared and made to suck fat black cock made to squeal with delight.

I want to be so pretty, so girly and so perfect

So I will not stop and I will keep trying to find me and I will tell you all about my adventures.
My sister well she can just live with it.


  1. There you go, don't let other people tell you what to do. You be who you are.

  2. *holds you and strokes your hair* Give her time, she loves you, be yourself and realize she also is worried you might get hurt.

  3. I have three teenage children and can only imagine what it would be like for them to deal with a sibling going though some of the things you've shared here. My only advice to you, and them is that everyone MUST follow their own path. We all must be loving and accepting of everyone. You and I are so similar in our way of thinking. I absolutely love your posts and descriptions and feel I could have written many many of them myself. I offer you all the happiness in the world as you search for joy, pleasure and your worldly identity. I also hope your sister may find peace and love in accepting you unconditionally for who and as you are.